B.L.A.H. = “Beyond Lost And Hopeless”

I have determined that BLAH is an acronym for “Beyond Lost And Hopeless.” This feeling can sneak up on you at any minute. It arises from the depths of confusion, fatigue, and sex deprivation. In 2012, I predict that people of all shapes, colors, sizes and ages will be affected by this momentary feeling of “WHAT THE F***!” B.L.A.H. is a moment not to be confused with sadness or loneliness. This moment usually passes within a day. If symptoms persist past 3 days try a glass of wine and/or other method of psychological escape. If this does not help consult a doctor of your choice immediately. Doctors include, but are not limited to a gynecologist, physical therapist, oncologist, orthodontist, psychiatrist and any other word ending in “ist” that works for you.

Moments you may feel B.L.A.H.:

When you’re bored

When you lose a job

When you feel stupid

When you look stupid

When you act stupid

During emo movie moments

When you end a relationship

When you want to be in love

When you’re on your cycle (men)

When you’re on your cycle (women)

When you conclude you’re not in love

When you realize you don’t know your purpose

When you feel like the word purpose is stupid

When you feel like you’re not serving any purpose

When you’re hungry and unable to get to food

When you feel like you’re having a bad day/week/month/year

When you spend your last few dollars on some form of transportation

When you realize you’re an hour into the dumbest conversation you’ve ever had

When you misspell words in an important message to friends, family, or co-workers

When you realize you’re pregnant and your religion has convinced you that you are pro-life

When you call on your significant other and find that they are not as significant as you thought.

The B.L.A.H. moment will walk up and pound you over the head if you don’t keep some G.O.O.D. in your life. G.O.O.D. stands for “Gracious Overly Optimistic Deeds.” Stay tuned for the blog on G.O.O.D.

Thank you for reading! Don’t be B.L.A.H. follow this blog!

Pura Vida,
Shelly

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