New Poem: Bi-Somniac

3am,

fingers glide over keyboard like tires over rumble strips

anxiety humming birds tummy muscles

a beautiful growl for peace

Everything’s OK

at least while I’m awake

 

4am,

unsure of the intimacy sleep will bring

I obsess over sexuality

straight never wins

neither does gay

Kinsey scale weighs me imperfect

 

Intimacy with the sandman only sparks unanswered dreams

I don’t want to fall asleep in a hopeless place

being bisexual feels much like being awake

Why slumber?

 

5am,

Let’s not call it insomnia

Such words corner indecisiveness as sickness

I’ll have my emotion and eat it too

wait for my needs to cool

Sip OCD with mint leaves and chai tea

 

6am,

text my California masculine fever

then kiss the forehead of femininity

I am smiling in two different time zones

her sheets call me like intuition

his “I love you’s” coddle my ego

We are paradise in a hand basket

 

7am,

the sun slays the night

sexuality blurs

life focuses in on reality.

I can’t sleep off these desire

so why slumber?

choosing would be resting my case

I’m not ready to lay my head on either pillow.

I don’t really have to decide today do I?

 

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